Because financial responsibility is overrated.

Sure, you could've started a Roth IRA… but instead, you bought quad tubes. And now you wear this shirt — not to brag (okay maybe a little), but to weed out the weak and attract fellow degenerates who understand that “price is just a number.”

This isn't just a shirt — it's a warning. Ask me about my NODs, and you're getting a 45-minute PowerPoint with laser pointer.

Why You’ll Regret Not Owning This Shirt:

• 💸 Comfort Colors 1717 – Soft as the lies you told your spouse about how much they cost

• 📦 Pre-shrunk & Built to Last – Like your NODs… unlike your credit score

• 😌 Relaxed Fit – Perfect for gatekeeping at the range or flexing in the gym parking lot

• 🧵 Double-Stitched for Durability – So it won’t fall apart like your budget

• 🇺🇸 Ethically Grown U.S. Cotton – Because you can be fiscally reckless and morally superior

Buy it. Wear it. Let the questions begin.
Just don’t forget to bring your monocle or duals to back it up.