Captain Albert Ebbs - M.B.E - expecting to be fired from his job captaining Pole Star company's line freighter the Martin Luther for some unvarnished speaking, is pleasantly surprised to find himself promoted to Captain of the luxury passenger liner Charlemagne.  This being a long-held dream since his cadet days, he is confident of handling his duties - after all, all ships float on water, contain machinery and sleep and feed people. It's only the people who differ...and he finds out how very much they do differ! Now he must host cocktail parties, dance with lady passengers, cope with amorous widows, deal with a Chief Officer who's a serial womaniser and a Purser making money on the side by stealing ship's supplies - and if all that weren't enough, a lot of unruly children and a crusty British Army officer who claims to know the Chairman of the Board. Subtle and sly British humor.